I’ve once had someone say to me, “Chris, I’m confused. He is proposing and I don’t know whether to say yes or no.” I’m sure you’ll agree with me that questions like this are not uncommon and often pop up whenever we’re faced with making that major decision. You see, a confused state is not the best time to make a decision that would decide your destiny, such as who to get married to. You need the dawning light of wisdom to clear the fog before you make up your mind. The problem with many singles is not the state of their hearts (love), but the state of their minds (wisdom).

There are a couple of things you will need to consider #BeforeYouLeadYourWayToTheAltar. One of these is, how he/she treats you? The way a potential spouse treats you tells you four things. 1. What you are worth to them. 2. Who they are. 3. What area of their life needs healing or growth. 4. A picture of what the future will look like if you eventually marry them. With these you’re nearly on your way to having enough information to make a decision.

What you find out will either make you walk away, pause the relationship for a while so they can get healed or grow, or stay with them in the relationship and endure what comes out of it, while you hope to see that they get healed/grow, or get married to them irrespective of whatever thing you discover.

A man who physically or verbally abuses you when you are dating might not stop when you get married. If she doesn’t respect you during courtship, what makes you think her attitude will change when she gets married to you. Marriage does not change a person’s character, it amplifies it. Be sure that he/she treats you like a queen/king. Never allow “love” blind you so that you settle for less than you deserve. Love is not blind, love knows what is right because it can see.

You are the next big thing. Make it happen!

About Sola and Chris Chukwunyere

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